Sunday, February 24, 2013

Marriage – Facts you need to know - 16

Marriage – Facts you need to know - 16

 

·        You need to know that if he's into porn, you have issues.

·        You need to know if someone isn't getting enough sleep, you will have issues.

·        You need to know if you attack each other's self-esteem, you have issues.

·        You need to know if you come home from work tired, hungry, and angry, chances are really good you're primed for a fight. With the nearest available target.

·        You need to know if you constantly criticize yourself, you'll be prone to constantly criticize your wife.

·        You need to know that living together before you get engaged increases the likelihood you'll marry a loser for no other reason than he's there and you know he's available. Now you have real problems.

·        You need to know if you can't be alone with each other—if you constantly need people around you—you have issues.

·        You need to know there is a point of no return if you wait too long to deal with problems.

·        You need to know these nine words that can change a relationship: "I was wrong. I am sorry. Please forgive me."

·        You need to know that when you're married, there's a lot more to disagree about than when you were just dating.

·        You need to know expressing anger and disagreement in a positive way can make a marriage stronger.

·        You need to know the quickest way to start a fight is to start comparing each other to other people.

·        You need to know to not throw around the "D" word. Used often enough, everyone could start believing it's a possibility.

·        You need to know marital discord is one of the leading causes of human suffering.

·        You need to know fighting with each other can make you nuts. Relationship difficulties are one of the most common reasons people seek psychological services.

·        You need to know that instead of trying to win an argument, the best thing to do is let everyone cool off. Put it on hold a few hours or days. See if the issue is still there when you come back.

·        You need to know to calm yourself down during marriage storms. (Not easy, but possible.) Science has shown that once heart rates soar, rationality leaves the room.

·        You need to know to learn to slow down your breathing during arguments. You're less likely to say something stupid.

·        You need to know if you think your husband can solve all your problems, you're going to have problems.

·        You need to know women argue differently from men. She'll threaten to leave; he'll want to watch TV.