Marriage – Facts you need to know -18
· You need to know listening can help you avoid a lot of fights. Like when he says, "I think we're spending too much money," he's not accusing you of being like your mother.
· You need to know if you think it's your fault, it probably is.
· You need to know that coming home tired, angry, hungry, and on edge is a good indicator of how the night will go if you're not careful.
· You need to know that truly hurtful comments are off limits.
· You need to know to never fight by e-mail.
· You need to know marriage doesn't give you permission to fight harder and scream louder. In fact, marriage is an invitation to always deal with your spouse lovingly.
· You need to know if you don't say anything mean and cruel, you'll have one less thing to apologize for.
· You need to know to not take literally most things said in the heat of battle.
· You need to know when you've been acting like an idiot—and stop.
· You need to know not every conflict needs to be fought.
· You need to know to show contrition. Sometimes even when you're not sure why the other person is angry.
· You need to know that being married requires you to be adult enough to admit when a fight is your fault.
· You need to know showing humility and compassion ends more fights than yelling and accusing.
· You need to know making an apology, even when you're not in the wrong, is sometimes required to restore sanity and peace.
· You need to know that going home to your parents is not an option. You are home. Work it out.
· You need to know you're biologically wired to remain physically agitated after an argument. This is a good time to ask God to shut your mouth.
· You need to know that the more skills you have at defusing arguments, the happier you'll be.
· You need to know to not let little things build up into a big thing.
· You need to know a soft answer really does turn away wrath.
· You need to know loving people can do hurtful things. This includes you.