You need to know a little kindness will help smooth a lot of the bumpy spots. You need to know you can be happy even when the other person isn't. It's a trait found in solid marriages. You need to know you're going to have to compromise on the thermostat. You need to know not all your dreams will be shared. Like your dream about backpacking through the Amazon. It may be yours alone. You need to know any electric blanket you put on the bed must have dual controls. You need to know you can no longer have best friends of the opposite sex. You need to know a marriage isn't a place to keep secrets. Like your secret love for sitar music. He's going to find out. You need to know your spouse should be the most important person in your life. You need to know the flavor of the wedding cake or the color of the bridesmaids' dresses doesn't impact the quality of the marriage. At all. You need to know to establish a routine. Don't be scared of that word. Routine is a good thing. You need to know to practice the fine art of not saying the first thing that pops into your brain. You need to know the strongest marriages are made up of two independent people who love each other, not two needy people who are dependent upon each other. You need to know an ideal family can be found anywhere love grows and flourishes. You need to know to talk about each other's day, every day, even though she just wants to take a bath and he just wants to watch TV show. You need to know to try and look good at home. Don't just put on stretch shorts and a Grateful Dead T-shirt and assume you look fetching. You need to know to be constantly aware of the health of your marriage. Does it need attention? A vacation? A babysitter? You need to know happy couples tend to go along with each other's wishes. Except maybe to the tractor pull. Or the scrapbooking store. Then you're on your own. You need to know a happy marriage means finding the one person in the world who accepts you as you are. Well, if you'd just shave. And not use your sleeve as a Kleenex. And pick up your shoes. You need to know that if you can't talk about money and sex, your marriage will never make it. You need to know how to express heated emotion without cursing, yelling, making accusations, or throwing things. Even though they were all effective when you were a teenager.
